Tag: Cardiff

The Cardiff Incident – RE: White Van Man

Posted on by News Desk

As I walked back towards the CVI limo I noticed the windows were steamed up. “What are you doing?” I demanded to know…

Hi, It’s the CNR from CVI here and I am probably getting ahead of myself a bit. Let’s start from the beginning, shall we? Ok, here is the bizarre story, involving a…yep you got it, a white van man.

As CVI enthusiasts will know I’ve been in Cardiff on tour, seeking out stories about white van men becoming “unhinged” in this “summer of scam” that is going on right now, as we speak.

I wasn’t disappointed .As soon as I took to the streets of Cardiff I found plenty of stories about white van drivers being unleashed and unchained.

At the end of a long day filling up my notebook with stories I decided it was time to take a break and get some food before heading back to the hotel for the night.

“Take me to Tesco,” I said to the Limo driver, and with those words he drove me through the quiet Cardiff streets to the supermarket car park.

“I’m going to get a pot noodle, do you want anything?” I asked the limo driver.

“yes get me a beef and tomato flavour,” he replied.

“Ok…oh and put the kettle on while I’m gone…we need it for our pot noodles,” I said.

Tesco was empty which meant I quickly located the pot noodle aisle and found a chicken and mushroom flavour for me and beef and tomato for the driver, then I headed for the checkout.

With two pot noodles firmly in hand I walked back out into the quiet car park and what I saw next I couldn’t believe. The end of the day suddenly became the headline of the day.

My first reaction was to drop the pot noodles and reach for my Motorola, but then I remembered it didn’t have a camera. So I did what any Chief News Reporter would do in this situation…I got out my notebook.

I simply wrote what I saw…

“White Volkswagen van driving around Tesco car park, with a man clinging to the top and doing press ups. Another man in the van driving. Man on top still doing press ups. Coked up? Puff the magic dragon? Has the white van man finally become totally unhinged? Still driving around the car park…still doing press ups..it has now driven off into the night.”

What more could I do? I headed towards the limo still in a daze.

As I walked back towards the CVI limo I noticed the windows were steamed up. “What are you doing?” I demanded to know…

The window of the limo opened up slightly and some steam flew out.

“I’m boiling the kettle…for the pot noodles,” the limo driver said.

“Oh” I replied, “of course,” realising I had forgot all about the pot noodles.

I went back and picked them up off the ground and then got in the limo.

We sat there in silence eating our pot noodles. I wasn’t even sure if the limo driver had seen the white van incident because the windows had been steamed up. I wasn’t even sure if this was reality anymore.

Rather than say anything about the incident I decided to finish my pot noodle and then say to the limo driver…

“Take me back to CVI HQ…we must drive through the night.”

I didn’t want to hang around in Cardiff any longer I thought to myself. This summer was getting way too strange.

The Summer of…White Van Women

Posted on by News Desk

Last week our chief news reporter told the truth about white van men. “The summer of scam,” he reported while on the road.

This week a new report landed on our desk here at CVI headquarters, and while our CNR continued to tour the country in the CVI limo and find out the latest news regarding white van men…we decided to push this news story regarding white van women forward.

The report started off with the quote – “Everyone has heard of the white van man, but now it’s the ladies turn.”

What are they basing this on? Well, according to official statistics there was 26,166 women who filled in a van insurance application form last year…compared to 17,198 in 2016.

Right now in 2018 we can only imagine how many women have already got their van insurance online.

Of course, many of them decided to compare van insurance for their white vans right here, at The Nations Favourite.

3 minutes is all any white van woman needs to get around 40 quotes from well known van insurance companies and brokers.

“There is no denying owning a van has many benefits, and it seems female drivers are starting to jump on the bandwagon,” was another quote we found in the report.

Reading on…we discovered that white women van drivers actually pay less than their white van men husbands and brothers…£181 less in fact, with an average quote of £1025 per year for coverage.

Perhaps more women are visiting CVI than men, and that is the main reason why they get cheaper van insurance? It wouldn’t surprise me one bit.

As regular readers are well aware, the white van men are too busy causing mayhem on our nations roads and appearing in court – “white van men unhinged,” it was called.

Meanwhile the white van women were accessing CVI on their computers, laptops, tablets and mobile phones, and then getting cheaper quotes in only 3 minutes.

One of the boom professions right now that requires a white van is dog walking, and statistics show that females are embracing this profession more than males.

Light commercial vans are typically the main weapon of choice for professional female dog walkers, with white being their preferred colour and CVI being their favourite website.

Self employed female cleaners also enjoyed getting cheap van insurance on their white vans…while female care assistants also got great prices.

Let’s just hope these white van women don’t go the way of the white van man, although if there is any unleashings, unchainings or if any white van woman becomes unhinged, then you will be the first to hear about here at The Nations Favourite.

Speaking of which…we have just received a text from our CNR out who is touring the country in the CVI limo.

“You are not going to believe what just happened in Cardiff…” he wrote.

Stay tuned for the full story.

Van “Mayhem” on the English Riviera

Posted on by News Desk

Where is van crime the most dangerous, the most wild, and even the most outrageous…London, Glasgow or Cardiff? No.

In fact, it is the English Riviera AKA Torquay where van criminals are having a field day and van drivers are out of control.

Take the incident in Torquay that happened recently, involving a…yes, you guessed it – WHITE VAN MAN!

When will they ever learn? Never is my answer, and it’s the reason why white van owners have such a bad reputation everywhere in the UK, even the English Riviera

Details of the incident are light on information. What we do know is that it involved a van and a motorcyclist, and according to witnesses the van driver was at fault.

Rage was something else that was witnessed – “I’m going to give you a damn good thrashing,” could have been said. We are still waiting for confirmation.

Does it stop there though…does it ever! This is Torquay we are talking about here. Sure, it is known for having great hotels with the highest possible standard of service and amazing views from all hotel rooms, but, it is also known for being a hot spot of van crime.

This was recently illustrated in a night of total carnage where arsonists completely destroyed a Green Citroen Relay van.

It happened at some point between 9:45pm and 10pm on an unusually cold April night in Torquay, and before long that van was a total write off.

I just hope that this particular owner had good van insurance to cover the damage.

Every van owner in Torquay should have the best van insurance in my opinion. If you don’t, then what are you waiting for? Fill in our 3 minute form right now.

Police are appealing for witnesses to the event, although as usual, it is expected that the public response will be – “I know nothing.”

Some tourists, who have come from places such as Barcelona and California are said to be horrified at the total van destruction they have seen on the mean streets of Torquay.

Yes, they enjoyed a Waldorf Salad, even when arriving at the hotel late, but if these tourists took just a small step away from the tourist area then they would quickly get a glimpse of really goes on behind the scenes of the English Riviera

The most common incident within the van community in Torquay? Theft.

So much so that Police have issued a warning for all van owners in and around Torquay after a recent crime spree.

Remember, these van thieves are more like Houdini than your typical old timer smash and grab criminals. You never even see them.

Van owners might go out for a Gourmet night, only to be frustrated by the lack of duck, and then be even more frustrated when they get to the car park only to find their power tools have been nicked. It happens all the time.

Don’t take the chance…make sure you are fully covered with the right van insurance by getting quotes right here at The Nations Favourite.

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Complete your quick and easy quote

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