Author: News Desk

99 Problems, But An Ice Cream Van Isn’t One

Posted on by News Desk

A few years ago we reported how ice cream vans were nearly “extinct.” That once familiar sound…now silent.

There is still a small army of ice cream van owners though, and many come here to CVI for their ice cream van insurance.

Our 3 minute form is just like the “99” of the van insurance industry. It’s simple, to the point, and you can finish it in 3 minutes.

Despite the ice cream van looking to be on its last round, that might not be the case. Not according to our inside expert in the ice cream industry.

We will refer to him as “Mr Whippy,” and what he told us shocked and stunned all of our staff here at CVI HQ.

Make no mistake about it: the ice cream industry still has 99 problems, but an ice cream van isn’t one…

What are we even talking about? Well, according to “Mr Whippy” there is a new ice cream van on the scene and if everything goes to plan then they will soon be on our roads, in force.

These brand new ice cream vans are powered by electricity…completely!

Not only are they electric vans but the ice cream making machines are also battery operated. Everything is electric, running all the way through the van like a bolt of lightning.

“I’ve got the power,” ice cream van owners will be saying around this nation of ours.

“That is one scoop of AC, and one scoop of DC,” they will go on to add.

So how could the electric ice cream van lead to a resurgence of the good old days of ice cream eating.

For one, they may start to get encouragement from local councils, who would welcome a “green machine” on the roads and ready to serve ice creams. They might even give government grants to encourage people to start an ice cream business.

It would be a novelty. That’s for sure. And it may even kick start a resurgence in the ice cream van. Who knows for sure?

What I do know is that ice cream van owners…

It doesn’t matter if you are petrol or electric…

AC or DC…

Work full time or part time…

You can get very cheap ice cream van insurance right here at the Nations Favourite.

Oh, and just to mention that our expert insider “Mr Whippy” is soon going to publish a book on how to start and run a profitable ice cream van business. It will be called “99 Tips to become an Ice Cream Millionaire.” Keep a look out for that one.

He Told The Lorry Driver – “I’m Going To Wipe Your…”

Posted on by News Desk

Those Police drug vans we told you about are stalking the roads of our nation. They are hunting down the “drug drivers” and taking prisoners.

Take Police in Essex as an example. They are one of the pioneers of a new technology called “DrugWipe” and around the roads of Essex they drive, day after day, in their Police Vans and armed with a big pack of DrugWipes.

Which is just as well. Because while patrolling the Essex motorway recently they noticed a HGV lorry pulled up on the hard shoulder. It wasn’t broke down and the lorry driver wasn’t stranded.

Instead, he was…

Fast asleep, like a baby!

That’s right. This particular lorry driver had decided to get 40 winks while the other traffic whizzed on by. He really didn’t have a care in the world.

He should have used an allocated rest zone or a service station, but not this lorry driver…the hard shoulder was the place to be, right there and then.

So it was right there and then when Essex Police swooped in and gave this lorry driver a rude awakening.

“Wakey wakey, rise and shine,” said the police officer.

No doubt the lorry driver was surprised to see an officer in blue waking him up, but he was probably even more surprised about what happened next…

After giving the lorry driver a stern telling off and taking down his particulars, the police officer then said something which shocked the lorry driver…

“I’m going to wipe your…mouth. It’s a DrugWipe. I need to get a sample of your saliva”

And guess what? It turns out the lorry driver wasn’t sleepy because he had been working hard. Oh no. He was sleepy because he was off his face on puff the magic dragon. Oh yes.

Can you believe that? Here at CVI we are a drug free zone and we condemn “drug driving” and applaud the new “DrugWipe” and the Police drug vans.

“If you snort up and then start up…your lorry or van…then you are NOT welcome at Cheap Van Insurance,” said a spokesperson for CVI.

As for the lorry driver. He was taken directly to jail. No passing go and no collecting £200 pounds.

Which reminds me. If you use our 3 minute form for Cheap Van Insurance then you could potentially save £200 or more on what you are currently paying.

Just make sure you don’t park on the hard shoulder to use CVI. And definitely do NOT fill in the form while high on your own supply.

RAISE THE…Kia Van?!

Posted on by News Desk

Incy wincy spider climbed into the van, What the spider found…wasn’t a white van man! Instead, it was a woman in Atlanta, Georgia, USA.

The spider was just hitching a ride no doubt, and after a while found its way onto the woman’s lap…and when she saw the spider she let out a massive…

“Argggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!”

To be fair this probably wasn’t your ordinary British spider with eight legs and a smiley face.

This was more than likely, a deadly and poisonous spider with a serious face and bad intentions.

The spider on the woman’s lap caused her to swerve her Kia Van directly into a river. Luckily she escaped unharmed, and it is believed the spider also came to no harm.

But the van? Let’s just say that “Raise The Kia Van” is now top of the list of priorities for Police in North Georgia, USA.

In fact they have even got a crack team of divers in to locate the van, after a boat failed to identify it.

Who is going to pick up the bill for raising the Kia Van? It is the van insurance company…apparently

That’s right. According to local Police the woman has fully comprehensive van insurance and her policy covers the cost of recovering a van from the bottom of a river.

If she didn’t have the correct insurance then the recovery would have came out of her own pocket, or even worse, they would have just left the van there for 100 years and more.

Although this story comes from the other side of the pond, I think it is relevant to every British van owner out there.

The message is simple: make sure you buy the best van insurance your budget allows…because if the worst happens and your van ends up somewhere like in a river…or even worse…stolen from your drive while you sleep or taken from your parking space while you work, then you want to make sure your van insurance company will take care of everything.

If that means pulling your van from a river with a crane, then so be it.

Or if that means giving you a courtesy van until they find your stolen van, then so be it.

Just make sure you are covered. Fully comprehensive van insurance is the best.

It’s also the most expensive type of van insurance, which is why you should use Cheap Van Insurance to compare companies and brokers and find yourself a really cheap deal.

You still get quality. Make no mistake about it. But you get affordable prices that won’t hit your hard in the pocket and make you say “ouch.”

You really can save a packet on fully comprehensive van insurance, and it starts here at CVI.

Waymo Self Driving Vans – Why So Much Hate?

Posted on by News Desk

We haven’t seen too much of self driving vans here in the UK…but across the pond in the USA…they are starting to attract attention.

Take Arizona for example, where a Waymo self driving van attracted the wrong kind of attention.

A shirtless man jumped in front of the Waymo self driving van and pulled out a gun. A 22 caliber Harrington and Richardson Sportsman revolver to be exact.

He pointed the gun directly at the self driving van, but no bullets were fired that day.

Police are saying this was an act of intimidation towards the Waymo. A way of saying…”get out of my neighbourhood, you are not welcome here.”

The man was later arrested (still with no shirt on) and taken to County Jail where he was charged and awaits sentence.

Arizona Police have warned this is not an isolated incident and is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to “Waymo HATE” in the scorching heat of the Arizona Desert.

Apparently it is a common sight to see rocks being thrown at self driving Waymo vans, and one van even had its tire slashed while stopping at a red light.

Other enraged Arizona residents have gone on yelling tirades against the Waymo vans, while another vigilante in a jeep forced the same Waymo self driving van off the road 6 times.

Why so much hate? I think many humans are starting to feel marginalised in this new world of automated technology and robots. Maybe they even feel threatened, almost as if the robots are taking over?

In my opinion this is just their way of saying…”we are still here. We still run this town.”

Only it is a losing battle, because self driving vans are very much here to stay both in America and around the world.

Here at CVI we applaud the efforts of Waymo and their self driving vans and we condemn vigilante acts in Arizona or anywhere else in America.

Hopefully the same thing doesn’t start to happen here on UK shores when Waymo, Ford, Apple, and Tesla start ruling the roads with their self driving vans.

We hope all of you van owners embrace the change and roll out the red carpet for this new technology.

Unfortunately I reckon there may be some problems. Perhaps some disgruntled (former) delivery drivers who are out of a job or a white van man just looking for any opportunity to let off some steam and some rage.

Fortunately you will be able to read about all of the exploits here at the CVI Blog. While at the same time comparing van insurance from around 40 companies and brokers.

They Stopped Him For Sliding Ladders, And Then…

Posted on by News Desk

It was a rainy and dreary morning in the city of Hull. In the distance you could just make out the familiar outline of the Humber Bridge.

The road was slick from the rain and Humberside Police were scanning the area like hawks, looking for their prey.

And then…they found their prey, and it was a, yes you have guessed it…

White Van Man!

Was this white van man going on tour or about to fly into a rage or shouting “chase me chase me,” from the window?

In a word…NO.

Actually, this was a builder on his way to a job. No doubt to build a wall or do some kind of brick work. There was probably even some cement and sand in the back, and maybe even a couple of bottles of tap water to mix it together.

Nothing out of the ordinary you would think, until you looked up and saw the sliding ladders.

Slipping and sliding all over the place they were. Sliding here and sliding there…they really were sliding everywhere.

However, they didn’t fall off the van. It was like a delicate balance. Just enough one way and then turn the steering wheel the other way. Like balancing a tennis ball on your head.

But the Humberside Police were having none of this.

“Should we pull him off the road,” said the first Police Officer.

“Yeah…pull him off,” said the second Police Officer.

Then, when everybody had pulled to the side of the road, the First Police Officer approached the van with caution while the Second Officer covered his back.

“You ever hear of a roof rack, sir?”

After a brief exchange it turned out the white van man was harmless and wasn’t about to go on a rampage worthy of VDGW.

However, while he was being a given a stern talking to at the side of the road and was having his particulars taken down…the second police officer scanned his van with the ANPR scanner.

“Bleep Bleep”

And guess what? Yes you guessed it…

No Van Insurance!

“Looks like somebody hasn’t visited Cheap Van Insurance?” Said the second police officer.

“You naughty boy,” said the first police officer.

It is a bit naughty, isn’t it? Not spending 3 minutes of your time to compare van insurance quotes from around 40 companies and brokers.

3 Minutes and you are sorted, and then you WON’T have 2 police officers bending you over your van bonnet and handcuffing you.

Oh yeah. And make sure all of you white van men (and women) secure your ladders with a roof rack and some rope or something. It is so simple, and so easy…just like our 3 minute form.

Police Chase White Van Man in Norwich

Posted on by News Desk

“Chase me, chase me, chase,” taunted the white van man. Pretty soon the cops were hot on his tail.

This happened in Norwich. The place well known for endless farm land and plenty of service stations to keep van drivers stocked up when they pass through.

Plenty of van owners in Norwich agree that CVI is The nations favourite and they visit our 3 minute form on a yearly basis to renew their van insurance and just have a good time in general.

“Back of the net!” they say, when confronted with around 40 cheap quotes from our trusted partners.

“CVI does it again,” they say, and in minutes their van insurance is SORTED for another year.

Back to the story and this particular white van man in Norwich was driving a vauxhall Astra van. Reports are unconfirmed if he is a CVI customer although chances are he is.

“The Nations favourite,” he may have shouted out the window when chased by the cops

“I’m doing this for CVI,” he could have added.

To all of our faithful white van men (and women) out there. Please don’t do that. You may be ecstatic at getting the cheapest van insurance price…EVER…but that doesn’t mean you should challenge the cops to a duel.

And if you are high on your own supply? Then you are not welcome at CVI. Sorry.

We pass on grass, and we encourage you to do the same.

It isn’t clear if the Norwich white van man was mashed up on puff the magic dragon. The Police couldn’t test his blood, although this will soon change with a new era of police vans.

The pursuit lasted for a good 30 minutes. Around and about the roads of Norwich they went. Weaving from side to side and avoiding the sheep on country roads.

And then into Norwich town centre, where terrified onlookers saw the white van speeding past…with the flashing blue lights of the boys in blue close behind.

It all came to a halt in the suburbs of Norwich, and they handcuffed the white van man for his trouble.

“Your nicked!”

“fair cop, guv.”

The Norwich van driver has since been charged with dangerous driving and he pleaded guilty.

He awaits a sentence, although it is expected he will spend time in the nick.

Hopefully he learns his lesson, and he can read our van insurance blog to pass the time. It might even be the best few months he has ever spent.

War On Drugs – Vans Lead The Way

Posted on by News Desk

Capturing Pablo Escobar in a Columbian town or arresting El Chapo at the Mexican Border…that has been the war on drugs. Until now…

Enter the humble van. It isn’t much to look at, I’m sure you will agree, but it could be about to become the biggest weapon in the war on drugs around the world.

Forget about hunting down drug lords in the jungles and mountains of South America. Say hello to the special Police van which brings the war to the roads of our towns and cities and the drug users who get behind the wheel.

This special Police van is currently being trialled…in America. But experts are expecting it to be on our roads within months.

So what is so special about this Police Van anyway? Quite simply, the back of the van is a portable drug testing lab, the likes of which you have never seen before.

This gives the Police new powers which can test drivers for drug use within minutes. And if found to be a “user” then they are hauled off in that very same van…directly to prison.

This special van is like a machine designed for hunting down the drug users and then carting them off to the jail house. Never before have we seen a vehicle so efficient. It really will make drug users think twice before snorting up and then getting behind the wheel.

“If you think a bit of puff the magic dragon is fine, then get ready to do the time,” is what a CVI spokesperson had to say when asked about the special Police Van and the global war on drugs in general.

“Here at CVI we have a zero tolerance policy on drugs and we only welcome van owners who are drug free and not planning to drive high on their own supply,” the spokesperson went on to add.

“If you are planning to fill out our 3 minute form while mashed up out of your face then think again. You are barking up the wrong tree…go to one of them other van insurance comparison sites who might be a bit more drug friendly,” the spokesperson said.

Back to the story and these special drug police vans are equipped with a chair and table in the back…where a suspect can be restrained and his or her blood taken…then the blood is immediately analysed and if found to be laced with drugs then…BINGO…Off-to-prison you go.

It’s good to see we are soon going to be winning the war on drugs, and with vans and CVI on their side, I’m sure the Police will soon have all of the drug lords, drug dealers and drug users under lock and key.

BANNED (And Dangerous?) – VDGW

Posted on by News Desk

It sounds like a new episode of VDGW (Van Drivers Gone Wild) doesn’t it? Unfortunately the VDGW cameras didn’t catch this on tape.

This story happened in Yorkshire, a place made famous by the classic TV programme “Traffic Cops.”

Our very own VDGW will soon reach the lofty heights of “Traffic Cops,” you can bet on that, and it will soon even challenge “Can’t Pay, Take It Away,” as The Nations Favourite.

Back to the story and a Yorkshire van driver who was BANNED from driving decided it was ok for him to get behind the wheel.

He didn’t care that his license had been ripped up and didn’t care that he didn’t have any van insurance.

It was his cousin’s van to be exact, although his cousin had broke his toe which meant he couldn’t drive.

“Get behind the wheel for me, cuz?” might have been the words spoken between the pair.

So the cousin did what a good cuz would do and got behind the wheel of the white van.

No license and no insurance…was this man dangerous? Did he go on a rampage worthy of VDGW?

In a word…No.

In fact, reports suggest he was a very careful driver who moved through the gears smoothly, stuck to the speed limit, and drove with hands at 10 and 2.

Some onlookers even suggested he waved at old women while driving and slammed his breaks on to allow a kitten to cross the road.

The perfect driver? Maybe, and model citizen? Perhaps…And he would have got away with as well if it hadn’t have been for…

A defective light!

Those “Traffic Cops” were soon right up his rear van door and flashing their blue lights.

“I’m going to pull this guy off the road,” said one Traffic Cop in a thick Yorkshire accent.

“Yeah, pull him off,” said his partner.

Long story short. This disqualified van driver found himself in court on charges of driving while disqualified and driving with no insurance.

“I’m Guilty,” he said in front of a shocked jury.

“I’m sending you to prison then,” replied the judge as the trusty hammer was slammed down.

“I’ve already got my bag packed,” replied the van driver.

Let this be a reminder to every van driver out there…

If you don’t have van insurance then you could go to prison.

The Police are becoming tougher on van drivers without insurance. It doesn’t matter if you are a safe driver or a nice guy…if you don’t have insurance then you could end up in the slammer.

So make sure you get insured today by filling in our 3 minute form. You have the power to compare over 40 companies and brokers, and will be amazed at the very cheap van insurance prices.

Wigan White Van Man Caught Red Handed!

Posted on by News Desk

As every white van man gets into his trusty white van in the morning there are certain things he has to check for…

Ham sandwiches? Check.

Flask of tea? Check.

Blanket? Check.

Cheap Van Insurance? Check.

Mobile Phone? er…Check.

However, it is the humble mobile phone which can give white van men the most trouble. As innocent as it looks, that phone can land you a hefty fine from the law, and it may even land you in prison.

Just like one Wigan white van man who took a quick call from a client while driving down a quiet side street.

“Alright mate,” the Wigan white van man answered, followed by…”Ahhhhhh, No!”

Those flashing blue lights of the rozzers were quickly in his rear view mirror, and in no time at all they had pulled him off the road and were taking down his particulars.

He was caught red handed using a mobile phone while at the wheel, and usually when this happens then BY LAW you will be fined at least £200 pounds and given 6 points on your licence.

This Wigan white van man wasn’t going to give in though, and he fought the law, but did the law win? Yes, eventually

A year later the Wigan white van man had his day in court and he lost. The judge slammed down the hammer and ordered him to pay a fine £1654 pounds, as well as pay the £200 pound fine for the mobile phone offence and the 6 points on his licence

Our advice to all white van men in this nation of ours, no matter if you are in Wigan or Wales…DON’T TOUCH IT!

If you are driving your white van then under no circumstances should your hands move out of view from the steering wheel at 10 and 2.

If you are reaching down below to touch your mobile phone then don’t come complaining to us if the Police have you banged to rights.

Even if you was just looking on your phone to check the CVI blog on a Tuesday to see if the latest blog post had arrived. What you should do is pull over the van on a country lane well out of sight, and then turn off your engine and take the keys out of the ignition.

Then, and only then, are you safe to read the CVI blog and compare Cheap Van Insurance from around 40 companies and brokers at our famous 3 minute form.

White Van Man VS Bailiff – “OH NO!”

Posted on by News Desk

It is the confrontation you have all been waiting for. The moment a white van man meets a bailiff. Everybody looked on in anticipation.

“The summer of rage is upon us,” said one onlooker as the burly bailiff looked mean and keen and ready for a ruck.

“OH NO!” said another onlooker as they spotted the white van. “This is going to get ugly,” they went on to add.

“Is this going to be on Can’t Pay, Take It Away?” asked another onlooker

“No. I think it will be on that new programme…Van Drivers Gone Wild,” replied another bystander.

Everybody got ready for fists flying and necks cracking. Rage, Anger and Discontent, all rolled into one.

But then…everybody ended up disappointed.

There was no confrontation and there was no street battle.

However, the White Van Man did get one up on the Bailiff, and he didn’t even have to get out of his van.

Could it be that our very own van white man is becoming smarter. Instead of seeing red and going instantly after the bailiff, the white van man made a simple phone call to give the bailiff what onlookers called…

“A taste of his own medicine.”

What happened here is the bailiff was on the street to do an eviction (nothing to do with the white van man).

But the bailiff decided it was ok to park in front of the drive of the white van, blocking it in.

“You can’t park there,” said the white van man from inside his van.”

“I can do what I want…I’m a bailiff!”

Trapped inside his drive like a lion in a cage, you would have expected fireworks at this moment. But no…a simple phone call led to something that nobody expected.

The Police came around and CLAMPED THE BAILIFF!!

Why? Because the white van man had a number of disabled stickers in his back window, which meant the bailiff had no right to park there.

While the bailiff was off doing an enforcement elsewhere on the street, his own van was being clamped.

So that is White Van Man 1 – Bailiff 0 – and the white van man didn’t even need to get out of his van.

Instead he sat patiently in his van and waited for the clamper to arrive. No doubt on his smartphone and visiting CVI to pass the time. Reading our blog posts and getting cheap van insurance from our 3 minute form.

Step 1

Complete your quick and easy quote

Step 2

Reveal your van insurance policies

Step 3

Pick your favourite and get instant cover